I Was There… But I Never Spoke

 I Was There… But I Never Spoke”

I started working at a café as a dishwasher.

At first, I was quiet… really quiet.

For almost two months, I barely talked to anyone.

I would just come in, do my job, wash dishes, and go home.

No one really knew me.

And honestly… I was okay with that.

But slowly, things changed.

I started getting comfortable.

I began talking to people… joking around…

and somehow, I became one of the most talkative guys in the café.

Everyone knew me now.

I wasn’t invisible anymore.

And then… there was her.

She worked as a barista.

She wasn’t like everyone else.

She had this energy… sometimes loud, sometimes quiet.

Sometimes she looked really happy…

and sometimes… she looked like something was bothering her.

I noticed everything.

The weird part?

I could talk to everyone in that café…

except her.

I don’t know why.

Maybe I liked her.

Maybe I was scared.

Maybe I didn’t want to mess things up.

So instead… I stayed silent.

I would see her every day.

When she was laughing with customers… I’d look from a distance.

When she looked tired… I noticed.

When she seemed upset… I noticed that too.

There were so many moments…

where I felt like I should just go and say:

“Hey… are you okay?”

But I never did.

And the worst part?

Because I didn’t talk to her…

she probably thought I didn’t like her.

Maybe she thought I was ignoring her.

Maybe she thought I hated her.

I remember there were days she looked really sad.

And I was right there.

Close enough to talk…

but too far to say anything.

I wasn’t just silent…

I made her feel alone…

even when I was there.

Other staff didn’t really like her, I don’t even know why.

But that made it worse.

Because maybe… she needed someone on her side.

And I could’ve been that person.

But I wasn’t.

Days passed.

Shifts ended.

And one day… she was just gone.

No goodbye.

No last conversation.

Nothing.

And that’s when it hit me.

All those moments…

all those chances…

gone.

Funny thing is…

She probably thought I hated her.

But the truth?

She was the only person I wanted to talk to.

Now I think about it sometimes…

If I had just said one word…

one “hi”…

maybe things would be different.

But life doesn’t go backwards.

I wasn’t a bad person.

I just didn’t know how to express what I felt…

until it was too late.

And now I understand something:

Silence can hurt more than words ever could.